Where There is Hate, Let me Sow Love

Now that I have one week under my belt, it's clear that these daily promises seems to be neatly falling into four categories. This is not intentional, by the way. As I've said before, I'm playing this all by ear. I have the things I'd like to do to get healthy; the stuff I do to enjoy my life with The Peanut and to help her grow; the jobs I need to do each day to keep the house clean and organized...and then there are the spiritual things that help me mentally. And believe me when I say I need all the help I can get!

I have never been a particularly religious person, although growing up I probably went to church more than anyone else in my immediate family. As a young child I would sometimes go to church with my grandmother. When I got to middle school and was living in the Catskills, the kids all seem to hang out at the CYO or the Jewish Community Center. It just happened to be that kids that lived near me were the RCs so I ended up also going to Mass and CYO dances. I went to a Catholic university, where I always went to Mass when I wasn't working, on Ash Wednesday, and for the Feast of St. Thomas Aquinas. I always enjoy the feeling I get from being at church, but I've never deeply believed. I love the stories, the lessons, the guidance, the unity. I'm just skeptical about a lot of things. I have, however, always been a deeply spiritual person. As all those that know me well will verify, I am very emotional and ever-so sensitive. I cry at the drop of a hat. Any guidance I can get to keep all my crazy feelings in line, the better. There are a variety of ways I've always done that. Mainly through reading, having creative outlets, and the biggie...talking for hours with great friends who are very intelligent. I'm analytical. I talk to myself. I pray.

Even though I have no idea what is out there...or up there, I get peace from praying. One of the prayers I adore and that makes me want to be a better person is the Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi. There are many versions. This is what I say daily:

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.


O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen

Today I:
checked TPP
danced with my kid to Ke$ha's We R Who We R
will go to bed with an empty kitchen sink
worked on teaching The Peanut something new. The hair was brushed. We tried to tie some shoes.
blogged
got the groceries for the monthly menu that will start on Monday
am on day three of training the kittens to use the toilet
said the Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi

---

The Making of a Couple of Mr. Jinxes

The dear, clever, beautiful child wanted pets. She wanted a million pets...well just a cat, dog, hamster, fish, turtle, maybe a chicken, and probably a few more I'm blocking out. She has had three fish. They've lived what I think was quite a while, considering they're from one of the two nasty looking pet stores in town.

A few years ago we tried to adopt two cats. I thought they would be perfect. They were older, fixed and declawed. They weren't siblings (is it even called 'siblings' in the cat world??) but they had been together since they were six months old. I thought they would be settled, plus keep each other company. See the other bad thing about declawing, is that the cats need to stay inside...which in and of itself, is a nice concept. You don't have to get up in the middle of the night to let the cat in or out. You don't have to worry about them catching diseases from eating things they shouldn't and can thus get away with not giving them their needles. Not to mention, just the nice feeling you get from knowing they're not going to get in a fight with a skunk nor get run over by a car. All these positives go out the window when you think about the big, nasty, stinky NEGATIVE about having an indoor cat: The Litter Box!! Oh man, when we had those two guys I hated the litter box. They were older and set in their ways...one of their ways being the kicking of the litter all over the place. Despite TLB being the the absolute worst thing ever, I dealt with it. The thing I couldn't deal with, however, was that they were huge beggars. No meal could be eaten in peace, and you couldn't leave food on the counter or they would jump up and eat it. I have friends and relatives that have cats that don't do this.I know that this should be unacceptable. Unfortunately, these fellas were seven years old, and they just couldn't be re-trained after that many years of obviously being fed people food. They sealed their fate the day I set my Whopper down on the table for ten seconds to run (literally run) into my bedroom to grab my phone. Don't mess with Momma's food, Mofos! I sent them back from whence they came.

Fast forward two years. The child is older. Her obsession with kitties has not subsided. She has just spent three and a half months in Korea where her auntie (really Momma's best friend, but same, same) has two kitters that are brothers. I started casually looking for kittens...very casually. I also said, she could have a hamster or a turtle if we found the perfect one. Then one of my friends announced that her cat had kittens. I told her to let me know more about them later when it was closer to adoption time. A few weeks later, my cousin's rabbit had babies. Cutting to the chase, we now have two twin kitter-boys, and they have a baby bunny brother.

Here's the deal-i-o. It's winter. Either these cat-boysies learn how to use the toilet or in the spring they will become outdoor cats. Whether they're indoor or outdoor doesn't matter so much to me. I'm getting them neutered and vaccinated next month so if push comes to shove they will be going outside, but all those positives above about having an indoor cat are true. I would really like to keep them safe because damnit they are cute...and the child has become quite fond of them. It's that one big negative that I have the problem with. I hate the litter box so much!! I change it everyday. This involves a lot of bleach, the vacuum and scrubbing the floor...every.day!! At a later date, we'll get more into housework, but believe me when I say I do not vacuum and wash the floor everyday. Beginning two days ago I have started to train them to do their business in the toilet. I expect it'll take a while, but I have friends that have done it and I think these fellas will oblige. After them, I'm moving on to litter train the bunny.

The promise of the day is to work with pets everyday. Train them, try to teach them something new, have a play or just a cuddle. For now it's trying to get Ernie and Pistachio to behave like Mr. Jinx and use the big-people potty. Wish me luck...I anticipate it'll be a shitty job!!

Today I:
checked TPP...and it made me mad, sad and then hugely loved
danced with my kid to the theme song to Nickelodeon's Victorious
will go to bed with an empty kitchen sink
worked on teaching The Peanut something new. She brushed her hair and we started with tying shoes.
blogged
made my grocery list for my monthly menu plan
am on day two of training the kittens to use the toilet

What's For Dinner?

Inevitably, I was going to have to go down the dreaded physical path of the daily promises. Make no mistake there will be lots of promises in this category because this is truly the part of my life that has been neglected the most. Surprisingly, a recent work-up of my blood does indicate that I'm healthy, but the scales, size of my clothes and huffing & puffing that would likely happen if I ever actually attempted to walk anywhere, would beg to differ.

The first place I'm going to start to make my life healthier seems easy but, to be perfectly honest, for me it will be a huge challenge. I do believe that not everyone needs to eat three squares a day, but I think if you're one of those people that do the several-small-meals-a-day approach you need to be health conscious. I, right now, am not that person. For as long as I can remember 99% of the time, I have only eaten one meal a day...and that meal is never breakfast...and is usually bought by me instead of being made by me. So for the immediate future, I'm not going to worry so much with exactly what goes in my mouth as opposed to when. I'm going to concentrate on eating three home-cooked meals a day. I'll worry about the content of these meals down the road, don't fret about that.

For someone that hates cooking and hasn't habitually prepared brekkie, lunch and dinner everyday, some organization is required. Today with the help of some friends that can cook (and seriously cook well) I prepared a full menu plan for a month. I'm actually looking forward to this challenge of cooking from the menu plan every day.

Today I:
checked TPP
danced with my kid to The Proclaimers' 500 Miles
will go to bed with an empty kitchen sink
worked on teaching The Peanut something new...continuing the hairbrushing
blogged
made my monthly menu plan

Too Early??

I'm hoping that by posting the thing I promise to do everyday for today won't jinx me. I am, after all, the epitome of procrastination and slacking off. Meh...here goes it: today's promise is to journal everyday. Obviously this blog will be my journal for days I'm able to be on the computer.

You have no idea how proud of myself that I have been actually posting for...how many days four, five?? Not even a week yet, but hey, I'm proud. It is a big accomplishment for me, but I also am aware that the more I add (not to mention when school vacation ends), it's only going to get more difficult to keep up.

That's all I've got for today.

Today I:
checked TPP
danced with my kid to Train's Hey Soul Sister
will go to bed with an empty kitchen sink
worked on teaching The Peanut something new...she's flying with the hairbrushing, btw.
blogged

It's a Hairy World

To be perfectly honest, there are some logistics to this mission of mine that I haven't completely thought through. Like what to do when I reach the forty-second day of this promise mission. Truthfully, I don't even have a list and am winging it everyday. Meh...I'm a cross-that-bridge kind of girl. Today's daily promise will probably need some input from others at some point, but for now I have enough material to go forward for more than a few weeks. It's just how to do it that has me a bit boggled.

The smaller of the two girls that live here, needs to learn many things...things that when I think about it, I already knew when I was her age. And as the momma, it's my job to teach them to her. This tiny girl has VERY long hair. Long and thick! I'm talking it has to be divided into sections just to wash it. She has had it cut several times, but it grows fast and is generally to her waist or her bottom. It's not too knotty and a breeze to take care of everyday, so I have been slack in teaching her how to take care of it herself. Starting today she will be taught how to brush her own hair.

Today's promise is to teach P something new everyday...and by everyday, just so that we're both not completely overwhelmed, when the new task is learned, a new one will be taught. I do foresee some battles, because she's small and her arms just aren't that long. Also, she gets easily frustrated when she isn't immediately successful at something. That will be the ongoing battle with this particular promise. Wish us luck!

Today I:
checked TPP
danced with my kid to Dynamite
will go to bed with an empty kitchen sink
will work on teaching The Peanut something new

Everything Plus the Kitchen Sink

Yesterday when I said most of these promises I'm making to myself in order to improve my life will be mental and/or physical, I went on to explain about the parental daily duties I have. Another part of my daily duties that I have thus far failed to talk about will also, inevitably, be a big part of the 42 ways to positively live my life. The reason this particular category of promises will be a big part is because a) I'm not wealthy, b) the child is too small plus it's against my own (possibly messed-up) parenting rules c) I'm the only grown-up living in this house and finally d) despite my many efforts at trying to live like a piglet, it really isn't for me...damn my mother for raising me in an immaculate house. You've guessed it!! I'm talking about the never-ending, daily chores it takes to run a household. I don't go overboard...I just try to make sure we're not sinking.

Speaking of sinks...today's promise is to make sure when I go to bed at night, the kitchen sink is empty of dirty dishes. I know, I know it seems like a given but this is kind of a big one for two main reasons; the first is I don't have a dishwasher...I am the dishwasher!!. In the winter, despite having tried every lotion available on the market, my hands get dry, cracked and washing the dishes is painful. I could use those ridiculous pink gloves but I find them uncomfortable. Usually by the end of January, I can no longer stand it and the gloves are pulled out from under the sink. The second thing is there are only two of us...one of whom right now only eats one meal a day (we'll get to that at a later date). There really aren't a lot of dishes to wash, so I do have a tendency to let them build up for two (or gasp) three days. They should be done everyday. I feel good when they are done. It's a small thing that makes me feel proud, so today's promise is to make sure there aren't any dirty dishes in the sink when I go to bed.

Today I:
checked TPP
danced with my kid to Katy Perry's  (aka my friend JAF-H) California Girls
will go to bed with an empty kitchen sink

Raise Your Glass

Obviously if I'm talking about things I promise to do daily that I feel will improve my life, many of these things will be either physical or mental. A lot of them, for me, being the lone parent to an only child will also be parental. Let's face it, most of the things I do daily are for The Peanut...which in turn, actually benefits her and me both. Win-win!

Today's promise is parental, physical and mental. The second promise of 42 is that I will dance with my kid everyday! Today since Ke$ha was already on, and since I don't censor language, music...or really anything except I'm not fond of play involving guns, we got our groove on to the party-girl pop-star with the nasty lyrics. And just because P!nk is P's favorite, we threw a bit of her in, too.

I like this particular promise because a) it's making me move my bottom and b) if anyone knows P's daddy, you know he is an amazing dancer. I have a friend from Harlem that swears his parents are lying to him and that there is no way he is 100% Korean. I hate that she misses out on getting some of that great talent. Let us all hope that moving her bottom along side mine doesn't hinder her ability to bring out her inner daddy. 

Today I:
checked TPP
danced with my kid

P.S. I like your beard!